A Tale of Pookie and Fluffy

Okay, so I posted these before explaining...if you already read them, and were thoroughly confused, woops, sorry 'bout that. As my favorite villian Dr. Doofenschmirtz would say, "Backstory!!!"
Josh and I have this running joke about our "alter-egos," Fluffy and Pookie. He's Fluffy, I'm Pookie. If you're really good friends with us, you've probably met them. If not, you will probably (hopefully) neeeveeer meet them. It's nothing personal. We'd just rather not intentionally embarrass ourselves, thanks, we're pretty good at that without meaning to anyways..:)..ANYHOOT. Josh and I were bored one time last summer, and the following stories for Fluffy and Pookie were the result.

Josh not only graduated from high school this week, but he's leaving for Texas in the morning as well. For the entire summer. I'm gonna miss him.

Pookie

I was born in a dark hole in the bottom of the galaxy.

My mother tried to eat me as soon as I was born, but I escaped by encasing her in a wave of my own mucusy-spit, which naturally hardened while I quickly jumped into the nearest wormhole. It transported me to the next galaxy over, on the planet GRARrrrrooupyypooolingoOOnnnYish.
It was there that I lived for the next eight years of my life, surviving on bugs and little children of the local dominant species.

Unfortunately, they caught me at last, stupid enough though they were. Since they did not posses the knowledge or intelligence to dispose of me permanently, they flung me to the farthest galaxy they could, on a little planet called "Irth."

BLIIIINDED and furious from my flight, I instinctively went into survival mode as soon as my ship touched ground.

Without warning, I was assaulted!!! A scent reached my nose unlike that of any before it. A maddening, powerful scent I knew could only prove to my destruction. It penetrated me with full force, maddening my brain and curling my stomache into a writhing, Gregorian Knot.

It pulled me in! Without knowing what I did, I ran, crawled, begged my body to move faster towards the smell. Suddenly, I stopped, puzzlingly looking at the enemy that had so besotted me. It was not what I expected. Indeed, my tentacular, shrewd, gleaming, death-piercingly cold eyes could not not but wonder at the sight of the carbon-based morsel of food strewn before me. Flecks of dark brown embedded themselves into the mesh of doughy chunks.

I took a bite.

And for the first time, I knew love.

Fluffy

day 98765 stranded on planet earth, I'm beginning to think that they were fibbing when they said they'd come back. I hate fibbers. Maybe joining the evil intergalactic air force was a bad idea. My best friend Glorp always joked around about how much better his life would be if i was stranded somewhere...jokingly of course, but then he would assure me that that wasn't true. Haha i guess the joke's on him. Bet he didn't see that one coming, HA! To occupy my time on this bitter planet i have taken to forming evil plots. One time i tried to enslave the whole human race, it almost worked, i had to settle for a little less than what i wanted because of the circumstances. Instead of enslaving them i got this one kid to be my evil helper so i wouldn't eat his dog. But he quit a week later and when i tried to eat his dog the dog kind of...gave me a boo-boo. it bit me. It would have tasted bad anyway. So instead I ate his pet rat that hid in his wall and kept stealing his stuff...I showed him! I was planning to destroy france next week when an angel fell from the heavens, she had the most beautiful tentacles and such a charming demonic voice. I loved it, so I decided to kidnap her using chocolate chip cookies. If someone wanted to capture me that's how they should do it, or maybe cook that stupid dog. but i couldn't feed her the dog, it was to mean so instead i fed her cookies. I asked, "cookie?" and gave her a cookie. she thought i said pookie, stupid dog bites. Then she devoured the cookies.

fluffy